Friday, March 8, 2013

Bipolar- is anybody REALLY successful?

Hello! I haven't been doing a very good job keeping up with my blog lately because I have been very busy!  My husband and I started a small business several years ago, and it has really taken off.  When we first started the business, I was also working a full time job and taking classes in computer programming.  I had a lot going on.   I can usually pull off three full years in a high stress job where I am expected to be on all the time. There came a point in time where I was feeling really overwhelmed, and I let go of the outside job and started focusing on our business and school.  It wasn't easy, and caused quite a bit of financial strain.

I finished the certificate in computer programming (added onto my BA degree).    The business got strong enough to provide enough income for both me and husband after I started writing custom software for home health companies.  Right now we are doing amazing!  We have actually hired our first full time employee. 

My life has not turned out how I planned. My career path has zig-zagged all over the place.  I have been a public school teacher, then a case worker, and now I am part owner of a business.  The key to my success is probably finding ways to take time off and  give myself a chance to slow down when  I need to. I know when I need some time off, and if I ignore the signs, I will have a breakdown. The longer I ignore it, the longer the breakdown.  A breakdown hurts you career much worse than a little down time or gaps in employment (in which you can creatively explain).

In the meantime, I've been getting some very interesting comments on my blog posts.  Someone questioned if I really was successful, and for a moment, I wondered that myself.  My life is sometimes a mess, but I sure have accomplished a lot!  Someone else said I was "too functional", and suggested I was not bipolar at all.  I assure you I AM!  There has been quite a debate on my topic "To have or Not Have Children."  I encourage you to read the comments on that post.  I really enjoy every comment, and I love the discussions we have.  My followers have really helped me stay strong. 

I would like to share one person's post, which I think is amazing. I call it, "What is Success?" The poster talks about everything he/she has accomplished, yet wonders if that really is success.    I think this is a very important topic and I would love to hear your stories.    
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Anonymous has left a new comment on your post
 
Hi there,
 
This post and these comments are exactly what I'm struggling with at the moment. I had my dream job and then things got weird a couple years ago. I have now been diagnosed with BP1 and have been in and out of hospital (for delusions, manic behaviour, etc). I had to disclose to my boss that something was wrong because I was acting very out of character (not the way one is to speak/act around their boss). They had decided to do a performance review after a few of my outbursts but the only thing that saved me was that I'd already begun the search for a good psych who by the time I saw him immediately had me admitted to hospital. (the company couldn't fire me for needing to go to hospital)
 
I have a business degree from one of the top uni's in the country and am about to embark on an MBA. I was made redundant about a year after things got weird at my dream job which sent me into a bit of a tizz. I'm very career orientated and haven't been able to get much luck finding a job since. So I've gone back to hospitality for a while to at least get money in. I feel that if I do an MBA I can say that was why there's a gap in my CV (it is actually due to my psychiatrist telling me to not work as I was teetering upon another episode with a bunch of other major triggers happening at the same time...).
 
As far as success stories go, I think you're right, ppl are in the closet or don't know if they'd consider themselves successful. It would depend how you would define success. Like as Amy mentioned, you may find more ppl saying they've been successful at the end of their professional careers (if they chose to retire for example, rather than going off the charts and losing their jobs).
 
I went to a group for ppl with BP and met a man in his late 50s, has rapid cycling BP for about 10 years, and found out that he needed to shape his career to be in a position to be the boss. That way he was less likely to get irritable at his superiors (as he said he said he spend 70 percent of his time apologising for inappropriate behaviour spurned by his BP). I thought that was a fantastic way to manage his career around his illness, to ensure his success (he is the owner of several successful businesses).
 
I guess we've got to trust in our abilities (something i'm struggling with now that I no longer have that 'dream job' and I was diagnosed and lost the job just under a year after being diagnosed) and build a career that allows you to escape to your office if you need to use meditation techniques to distress, or work to your own hours or be autonomous or whatever it is that will less likely to trigger you.
 
Hopefully I'll be able to join you in that secret bipolar and successful club, and maybe we won't have to be so secretive about it then.
 
Best of luck.
 
Posted by Anonymous to Bipolar And Successful at March 5, 2013 at 11:46 PM

20 comments:

Anonymous said...

My son has bipolar 1 and is a nurse. he got sick and was hospitalized at the age of 27 while he was in school.He recovered, finished school and is now an ER nurse. He was hospitalized again recently, was off work 1 mo and is now working again. He is amazing to me. His employer has been very supportive. He is a great nurse and is really well liked. He takes care of himself in many ways, is an avid exercizer,eats well,and takes medication. I worry that he pushes himself to hard and works too much. But i would consider him very successful. I find it disheartening to read so much information about ppl who feel they cant work, and dont manage their condition very well. I accidently found this blog, as i was searching for positive info on bipolar. I am glad their are ppl who believe they can be successful and are willing to share their story.

The Stingrocker said...

Thanks for this blog. I was recently diagnosed with bipolar 2 after struggling for many years and not quite understanding what was wrong with me. Despite the ups and downs, I managed to be reasonably successful. I earned a master's degree from a top tier university, and I'm planning to go on to a doctoral program. However, I have missed out on a lot of great opportunities and irreparably damaged several relationships because of the illness. I also had to leave a job a couple of years ago because I was hospitalized for severe depression for two weeks.

I've been on Lamictal for about a month, and I can already notice a huge difference. I was on so many different antidepressants over the years, but none of them ever helped for long. The recovery has been bittersweet. I'm happy to be feeling better, but I'm also in mourning for everything that I've missed out on, and angry that I had gone misdiagnosed for 12+ years due to subpar psychiatric care.

Anyway, thanks again for this blog. Most of the other people with bipolar that I've met are much lower-functioning than I am (i.e., on disability for decades and talking to God at Pike Place Market). It's nice to know that I'm not the only one thinking about the issues that you're writing about here.

Anonymous said...

Hi, I'd been teaching for two years when I got my dream teaching job. I loved it and was well liked by my superiors, probably because due to my often slightly manic nature, I was one of the hardest worker there. I believed that I was successful.

One unfortunate episode later and I am now unemployed and being treated for bipolar. Due to my current state I am pretty much unemployable and could probably never go back to that career.

The way I see success now is achieving the goals I set out to achieve. My goals have changed a lot now. My bosses saw me as successful because I got them what they wanted - happy kids, good statistics etc and probably outperformed a fair few other teachers there. My goal now is to find a job I enjoy and can manage, it could be working in a coffee shop for all i care, that I will consider success.

Thankyou for this very useful and insightful blog, I especially liked your post on having children.

Anonymous said...

I'm bipolar and I quit my job four years ago because the 9-5 just drives me crazy (pun intended). So I took to freelancing so I can work only at times when my energy levels and mood allow me to, rather than force myself to work in the most inopportune times and be mad at myself for not doing what I'd rather do.

And by the way, success for me means writing and getting paid for it (no matter how meager), keeping a semblance of a social life, and getting through the day to live another (given my frequent inclination to just quit and end it all).

Anonymous said...

This is a really great site, thanks for creating it. I could probably leave a comment in each of the posts...I'm a 34yo bipolar 2, former smoker(still miss it, I LOVED SMOKING), who has a young child, former professor at a major university(taught for 6 years), and a successful artist. Spend the time finding the right doctor and medications, and when the medications work, stay on them. If you don't have health insurance, look into NAMI.org (it's a great resource, let them help you). Also, if you are a college student, make sure you register with your college's disability center, this allows your professors to know that you have a illness and MAY need special accommodation. The best thing you can do is to know your rights(including at work), talk to the folks at NAMI, this is what they do. It is absolutely possible to have a happy, interesting and successful life if you are bipolar. That's not to say that there aren't going to be months where you feel like you are clawing your way out of hell...but if you create a support system for yourself, take your medication, I promise you, it will eventually pass. There is a wonderful graphic novel that just came out by Cartoonist Ellen Forney, called MARBLES. I can't recommend it enough. http://www.amazon.com/Marbles-Depression-Michelangelo-Graphic-Memoir/dp/1592407323

Anonymous said...

Hi Amy,

I really appreciated your post. It breaks my heart to hear about episodes, as I know how ruinous they can be. I wonder if the commenter lost their dream job because of the BP....

I'm convinced there are more successful individuals with bipolar disorder out there. They probably just don't talk about it because they're doing alright. After all, there is usually selection bias amongst people posting (or being posted about) on the internet: either exceptionally successful (celeb stat) or exceptionally unsuccessful (complaints and advice-seeking because they're unsuccessful). My psychiatrist also said he knows a number of high-achieving individuals with bipolar disorder out in industry.

I recently tried to get connected with the 50 something BP students at my school but was unsuccessful due to lack of interest and various coordination problems unique to our school schedule (not all students being at school at the same time etc). For instance, only 7 were currently on campus but only one was interested in meeting up. However, I mean to continue my search through my psychiatrist as I begin my career.

In in unrelated note, I wish this bloody disease did not exist....I get scared thinking about potential episodes, coming to wreak havoc on relationships and reputation.

Anonymous said...

Hi all,

I was diagnosed with bipolar, 8 years ago. Now, I have focus all my core gifts in learning more of online jobs. Through this I can generate income stream without going much from my home office. I think we bipolar person had enough time to learn our strengths and move forward with our lives.

Anonymous said...

I am BP, and I lost my good paying job this week. I worked on a Florida based company. But I use my home office back here in Philippines.

Anonymous said...

Hi Amy,

I thought your post was very insightful. Being an also very "career oriented" person, I found it devastating when I crashed and burned while studying abroad earlier this year due to a manic episode that resulted in a nervous breakdown and has now left me with a huge gap in my CV (something that will not look favorable on a grad school application...) I am finding more and more that it takes some self realization to live with bipolar disorder and maintain a healthy lifestyle while still taking one's career/educational pursuits into account. Although I have had my heart set on going back to school and getting my Master's degree, I'm afraid I will not have the capacity (stress-wise) to deal with stressors and will potentially relapse like I did before.

I admire your tenacity for taking the right steps to get healthy and maintain a balanced
lifestyle after your hospitalization. I'm currenty in the same boat (hospitality job and all). Hope to hear more successes from you in the future.

Anonymous said...

OMG!!!!!THANK YOU,THANK YOU< THANK YOU for this post & blog. I finally found people with a similar issue. I consider myself the bipolar business woman. I had had more jobs than I would care to admit to, excelling at them all but never lasting more than a year. I have 6 failed businesses under my belt. Well, 5. The most recent one that I started alone is still thriving but I was booted out by my partners due to my constant mood swings. I'm so sick of apologizing. My relationship recently ended because he was said I'm an emotional wreck. Sweet one day, verbally abusive the next. So i'm presently depressed and with no income and my mind wont stop racing :-(

Anonymous said...

(cont)Thank you for the information regarding the school disability center. I am finishing my MBA but it's a huge struggle. I'll check NAMI out as well

Unknown said...

I admire your success pulling it off with a high stress job in 3 years because, normally, people with bipolar syndrome can’t take so much stress. A condition like this shouldn’t be a hindrance like what other people expect it to be. Among the many ways on how to beat the syndrome are perseverance and counseling. And I can see that you know for a fact that you can’t let it control your life. Thanks for sharing!

Russel Dill @ Kenosis Center

bipolar equestrian said...

makes me so happy to see someone who is bipolar and living!! :)
Im 19 and was diagnosed bipolar at the age of 15. I was just feeling really down and not wanting to keep going but search "sucessfull bipolar people" and this came up!! :) thank you.

Anonymous said...

I think it's amazing that you've done so many things coz the first sign of a mental illness is dysfunction. I quit jobs more than I can say, I couldn't sustain anything, not even college. And I thank you for giving me/us hope that we can have a "normal" life. I'm not bipolar though, I have BPD, but I struggle with the same things.

Great blog, I hope you visit mine and post soon :)

Anonymous said...

sounds like you have accomplished alot! thats amazing given you have bipolar.
i have struggled for 15yrs to find a career now i have 3 part-time jobs and free-lance i cant stick to anything. i dont understand how people do it.
i illustrate for 3 well known magazines regularly but i absolutely force myself to do these at the very last minute and almost have a mental breakdown every month. i dont know what im doing. i cant do anything unless it has a deadline.
i just want a coffee shop job too. 9-5.
anyway congratulations to all who have been and are successful. i dont know how you do it.

Manic Success said...

This site is the first time I have come across people like me. I always thought I was just emotional with occasional bouts with depression. Now I have a better understanding and would like to learn more. I created a blog manicsuccess.blogspot.com I hope you all will visit and share your story and your success. I detailed how I first identified the real root of my issues right here on Bipolar and Successful.

Amy said...

Manic Success, Thanks!
Love your blog!

Anonymous said...

Hello,

Thank you for writing this. I am also a professional with BP I, and have managed to keep a high level job, get married, have a kid on the way... and am still struggling with managing the emotional and psychological fall out from the diagnosis, in addition to the everyday challenges.

I am wondering if you know of a community of high functioning BP people, or any kind of support group geared towards professional BP?

Great blog and any info/help/direction would be appreciated.

managingmania2014 @ mail.com

Emily Wonder said...

My daughter (Annabel) suffered schizophrenia for 5 years. I had no idea what was happening and didn’t know where to turn for help. It was hard then because I really didn’t understand the symptoms earlier until she was diagnosed. There was a time she decided to get away from everyone, I was not excluded. I had to sit and cry almost every day because I felt helpless as a single mother (she is all I have got). The anguish I went through taking care of her alone is beyond explanation because there was no support whatsoever from the dad or family members. I fought for proper medical care and humane treatment; I did everything within my reach to get her cured but all to no avail. Countless different medications was prescribed (Zyprexa, fluphenazine, Risperdal, quetiapine, etc.) that she was taking but all we could get was myriad of side effects such as rigidity, drowsiness, dizziness, tremors and restlessness which tends to worsen the already damaged situation. Frustration was the order of the day. I wrote a couple of messages to Ontario Mental Health Foundation for help because watching my daughter go through such was devastating. It was at this foundation someone shared a testimony about DR Sunday herbal medicine, how effective it is and how she went through the most difficult times of her life trying to help her mom fight Schizophrenia. Being that I was already at the verge of giving up because I just couldn't imagine waking up every morning to fight the same demons that left me so tired the night before. I had to contact the doctor,on his email  (drsundayherbalcenter@gmail.com)  from our conversations; I was relieved and convinced that the result is going to be positive because I was made to contact people with worse cases. Today, the awful situation of my daughter has gone by. Her happy life is back. She is now a schizophrenia survivor and I am glad because my daily routine activities can now kick off without obstructions. Don't let Schizophrenia hinder you from living a desired life and also, never allow anyone to decide for you especially when they don't know what you have to go through to get to where you are. I was almost discouraged by the doctor but then, I remembered that: I have to shield my daughter’s destiny with courage, faith and perseverance because she is not in her right state of mind and that the bravery and freedom from fear is found in the ‘doing’. Her life is now a testimony. After my daughter got cured,from the herbal mix medicine Dr Sunday prepared and sent to me, she said, Mom “I just thought, ‘Well, I’m a weirdo, I’ll never be normal, then I said, my daughter, life itself is a misery and we get stronger in the places we have been broken. Thanks to you Dr. Sunday  for your excellent counseling, no more psychotic symptoms for the past 3 years and 4 months now. To know more about Dr.Sunday and the effectiveness of his Herbs and roots extracts and he said he got cures for diseases like Bipolar,DIABETES, HPV,SHINGLES,CANCER, ALS, HEPATITIS B, KIDNEY DISEASE, HERPES, Ovarian Cancer,Pancreatic cancers, Bladder cancer,Skin cancer, Prostate cancer, Glaucoma., Cataracts,Macular degeneration,Cardiovascular disease,Autism,Lung disease.Enlarged prostate,Osteoporosis.Alzheimer's disease,psoriasis ,Tach Diseases,Lupus,Dementia.kidney cancer, lung cancer,. You can reach him on his Email at ... drsundayherbalcenter@gmail.com.  I believe you will testify just like me.

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