Should I Stay With Someone Who is Bipolar?

So, you're involved with someone who is bipolar. Should you stay with that person? Maybe not. If that person makes you unhappy- No. If you are staying with him out of pity- No. If you are hoping that someday he will be "normal"- No. If you don't love this person with all of your heart- don't stay.

Why should the rules of love change just because one partner is bipolar? I've been dumped dozens of times, and looking back, each of my x's did me a favor. Not because they were bad guys and not worthy of my time, just the opposite. Most were good guys who did not want to deal with the black cloud of bipolar hanging over the relationship. Can you blame them?

My rocky relationships forced me to work on myself. Eventually I met my match, someone who loved me despite my faults. I met a man who learned how to turn his head when bipolar Amy was speaking, and patiently waited for the more rational Amy to return. Our relationship is not based on drama, pity, or unrealistic hope.

Bipolar, My Thoughts About Medications

Did you know that most medications for bipolar disorder where stumbled upon by accident? Many were created for seizure disorder, and they accidentally discovered that they worked for bipolar as well. Even Lithium was first used to treat gout, not bipolar. Medical science still doesn't know how or why most of these bipolar medications work. So why should doctors be surprised when our medications don't work?

Has anyone stopped to consider that we are attempting to treat two conflicting conditions, depression and mania, that do not occur at the same time? Just as diabetes has extremes in blood sugar level, bipolars deal with extremes in mood and energy. Is it logical to think the same same drug should work to treat both mania and depression?

I don't know enough about pharmacy to comment much further on this topic. I still have hope that bipolar medications will someday evolve into more than just hit or miss treatments.

Bipolar, We Each Have Our Own Journey

I've spent most of my life searching for the cure to bipolar. At first I thought my lot in life was to blame. Then I found a good man, a good job, and a good home, but I still struggled with mood swings. For years, I hoped it would be as easy as finding the magic pill. There are a lot of wonderful medications out there, but medications alone are not the cure. I'm still on my own journey, but I think a healthy lifestyle, a loving support system, and a good psychiatrist are key to bipolar success.

The bipolar journey is a bumpy ride.

Bipolar, Build a Safety Net

Everytime I'm put on a new medication and it works, I think "I'm Cured!". I should know better by now, I've been battling bipolar mood swings for 25 years. It's been ten years since my last major breakdown, one so severe I could not work for months. Yet, there have still been many bumps along the way. It was blind luck that prevented me from losing my home during my last major bout of depression. Somehow I managed to get unemployment, and a kind neighbor became my friend.

Hopefully you will never have a complete breakdown. Hopefully, You will never become too ill to work. The government won't step in to help you until you've lost everything, trust me I've seen it first hand. Build some sort of safety net for yourself. Create a "What If" plan.

As for me, I try to pay my major bills at least three months in advance. Although I'm doing well and can afford more, I keep my liabilities modest. Friends who earn less, own more. But, I can not risk living paycheck to paycheck.

Some promotions I've passed by. I know my limits. When I'm doing well, I work to expand and improve my skills instead.

When living with bipolar, it's best to play it safe. I've watched my bipolar friends thrive and then fall. I chose to stay away from the ledge.

Some of my bipolar friends have given up. They are afraid to try at all. They say it's easier to collect disability. I understand that seems to be playing it safe. But, it's important to stay competitive and know how to provide for yourself. What the government gives, they can take away, and I've seen that first hand as well.

I know it seems that you have to try three times harder than anyone else. In many ways, you do. Despite these challengeges, you can build a happy and comforable life for yourself.